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Selecting a bridal party is a lot like picking a team in dodge ball; either you’re playing to win or just to have fun.  If you’re a DIY Bride then choose very wisely because each member of your bridal party will need to have the skills and the personality to get the job done.  This also goes for your significant other and their bridal party because if [at most] you’re thinking of Day of Coordination then Ducks in a Row it must be or Squirrels at a Rave you will have …

Thinking of going with a planner?  Of course, the honor attendants will always have duties and you may have duties for the other attendants.  However, the entire weight of your wedding won’t be on your shoulders and your bridal party won’t need to be bribed with wine to get tasks done [we all know where that ends up anyway].  

So before you set about deciding who to ask and present the box you’ve worked so very hard on make sure know which route you’ll be going.  Is this something that’s great for you and your relationship or would it be money well spent to have the stress, and clutter, out of your growing romance?  

​There’s no wrong answer, but there’s a right answer for each couple.

You know the word.  It describes everything anti-dream, magical, and amazing.  It’s pushy, ever-present, and there’s one at every wedding.  Well, I can’t think of a time when I’ve ever been happy to see one ….

It seems like B-word is always out to ruin a good time.  That same B-word is ready to  put a damper on the fun at the first chance.  B-words suck, don't they? 

The B-word, budget, is a source of stress, but it doesn’t have to ruin our good time, put a damper on our fun, or not let us have the wedding of our dreams.  As frustrating as it is not to have a money tree growing in our backyard, there are a few good aspects to having budget.  Aside from going bankrupt and having to sleep under the stars with your new spouse (not like the romantic kind of sleep under the stars, but we don’t have four walls so we don’t have a roof either kind of sleep under the stars).  So, that’s pretty extreme, what are some okay reasons for a budget so we don’t totally hate it and some of the sparkle and magic stays on your engagement.

A budget encourages personalization.  If everyone had the same amount to spend on a wedding then they would all look like whatever is on trend with different couples in the photos.  It’s the personalization, the creativity, and how we overcome some of the need/want versus budget that makes each wedding day so unique.

It makes us prioritize what’s most important in the wedding so that we focus on that aspect.  If the ceremony is the most important part then spend on your dress, the florals, and a videographer (get audio because you’ll want to hear your vows again). If a raging party is what you want then put your money on venue, entertainment, and make sure to have an open bar.  

It’s hard to stay on a budget, some are incredible at it, but most of us suck at it (let’s be honest because they’re like diets).   Here are a few tips for keeping your budget-based  stress lower: 

• Have your total spendable budget finalized before your hire any vendors, book a venue, or buy one thing.  In fact, don’t get on Pinterest until you know how much you have to spend.
• Go through your wedding checklist and cross off anything you will not be doing 
• Go through your wedding checklist, on a separate sheet of paper write down any task that includes spending money (add + gratuity next to any vendors you give a gratuity).
• ​When you have “the talk” (the one about the B-word) make certain everyone is on the same page.
  
• Once you see what you have to work with decide what’s the most important to you (and if anyone is helping you pay for the wedding get their opinion too)
• Find a budget tracker (The Knot and Wedding Wire have great ones online) or create a budget tracking sheet and stick to it.

Ever heard the saying, “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch?”  Yes, it’s a bit morbid, but very true.  Until you have the funds assembled and know for certain that your budget is solid, it’s still in the works.  It it’s an item, such as paying for your wedding gown, hair or makeup or the Rehearsal Dinner, then agreeing on a set amount should be enough as long as both parties stick to the plan.  If the budget for the dress is $700 and I decide I want one that’s $900, I need to be prepared to pay for the other $200 and alterations (unless I’m one of those amazing humans that just puts everything on and it fits).  

However, communication is underrated and taking the time to try on other dresses then expressing how we feel in a healthy and respectful manner, one that shows we’re very appreciative and are prepared to pay the difference and hold no resentment over it.  We just want to make sure it’s not going to upset the one being gracious enough to buy the dress …. and we may be surprised at the answer we get because in the end this is all about love.  

Engagement parties are a chance for those closest to you to celebrate your engagement share how happy, and for you to share your happiness with them.  It can be at your home, virtual, or a happy hour.  
COVID-19 has made the virtual engagement party a great option.  As well as being affordable, it’s a pretty cool to begin with when you think about it since social media platforms now have group video capability.
Are invitations necessary?   It would depend on what kind of Engagement Party you were planning, but most would be great with something like RSVPify (free events) or sending an electronic invitation (a text photo).  
In-home or virtual, both are very cost-effective.  They’re are about starting an exciting new chapter in both your lives.  Your families will now know you as both of their children (if they don’t already see it that way), so it’s a big deal.  This is something to celebrate.
Really want to keep cost low with an at home?  Make it B.Y.O.B. or a cocktail hour with cheese and crackers!  No decorations needed.  Maybe a We’re Engaged sign or balloon?  The Engagement Ring is probably enough ;)